Release, Reflect, Repeat: The Power of Embracing Tears Without Apology

Why is it common for people to apologize when they cry or express emotions? Over my two decades of experience as a therapist, I've consistently encouraged clients to embrace and freely express their emotions, fostering an environment free from shame and judgment to help promote healing and wellness.

Crying is a natural and healthy emotional response to various situations in life. Whether it's sadness, frustration, joy, or even relief, shedding tears is a fundamental aspect of being human. However, many of us have been conditioned to apologize for crying, as if it's something to be ashamed of or a sign of weakness. In reality, crying is a powerful tool for processing emotions and promoting mental wellness. I wholeheartedly welcome tears, imagining them as a means to release and let go of things as they gently stream down my face.

Here's why we shouldn't feel the need to say sorry when tears start flowing, and why embracing our emotions is crucial for overall well-being.

Validating Your Feelings

When you apologize for crying, you're essentially dismissing the validity of your emotions. It sends the message that expressing vulnerability is wrong or unwelcome. Instead, I encourage clients to acknowledge and honor their feelings, recognizing that they are a natural part of the human experience. Whether you're crying out of sadness, frustration, or even happiness, your emotions are valid and deserve to be acknowledged without judgment.

Release and Relief

Crying serves as a release valve for pent-up emotions. Holding back tears can lead to increased stress and tension, whereas allowing yourself to cry can provide a sense of relief and catharsis. Tears contain stress hormones, so shedding them can actually help reduce feelings of anxiety and promote a sense of emotional balance. By embracing your tears, you're giving yourself permission to let go of negative energy and make space for healing. We take in so much on a daily basis but spend very little time letting the energy or feelings go.

Building Emotional Resilience

Contrary to popular belief, showing vulnerability is a sign of strength and courage, not weakness. Check out Dr. Brene Brown’s TED Talk on vulnerability. By allowing yourself to cry without apologizing, you're demonstrating courage and authenticity. This willingness to be emotionally honest fosters deeper connections with others and cultivates resilience in the face of adversity. It takes courage to confront your emotions head-on, and by embracing your tears, you're taking an important step towards building emotional resilience and providing a positive role model for others struggling with letting go of various emotions.

Promoting Well-Being

Suppressing emotions can have detrimental effects on your mental health. Research has shown that allowing yourself to experience and express your feelings is essential for overall well-being. Crying can help regulate mood, reduce stress, and enhance emotional clarity. By refraining from apologizing for your tears, you're prioritizing your mental wellness and embracing a more compassionate attitude towards yourself.

Encouraging Authenticity

When we apologize for crying, we're essentially hiding our true selves and putting up a facade of strength. However, true strength lies in authenticity and vulnerability. By embracing your tears and refusing to apologize for them, you're embracing your authentic self and inviting others to do the same. This fosters deeper connections and creates a supportive environment where everyone feels free to express themselves without fear of judgment or shame.

Crying is a natural and essential part of being a human. Be careful when you are connecting with someone who is expressing their emotions through tears. I encourage you to be more supportive of their courage to be authentic and let go of the energy and sadness that they have been carrying. On the other hand, rather than apologizing for shedding tears, we should embrace our emotions and allow ourselves to experience them fully and freely. By doing so, we validate our feelings, promote mental wellness, and cultivate deeper connections with others. So the next time tears start to flow, remember that it's okay not to say sorry. Instead, allow yourself to cry freely and honor the beauty of your emotional experience. If others are uncomfortable with your tears or sadness, that's on them not you!

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